hello...
no mood to blog recently..
so sorry...
but everything is fine...physically...but not emotionally...
my SIP is good..people there are nice and funny...
getting used to my rountine work already..
do manual test...do until the thumb cramp cos need to keep pressing the pipette up and down to do serial dilution...sort sample..label sample...centrifuge..do testing..keep sample...
next week will be busy week cos my lab doing some project with KK hosp...then not enough ppl...so i'm transfered to the biochemistry side for 3days...to VDRL testing..done it at the Immuno section le..so i guess i'll be alright..
my section head very funny...suddenly one day ask my three other frens working there " where is Joanne...i miss her.."...oh my...now my frens kept making fun of me..say she's my god mother...
then today..she sms another immuno collegue..." Fendi (the person name), where is Joanne?"..ha..i dunno what time she mesg Fendi...but it's either i'm outside buying food or finish eating lunch went back to work le..eh..so funny...at first see her very fierce one ...dun dare to talk to her but now..hmm...starting to talk and joke le..
but after a week...we will rotate le..dunno what section i'm going next..
oh ya...next week got 4 Singapore Ploy year 2 students coming for attachment but only for a mth...what are they going to learn man..anyway...hope it will be fun..

i'm sorry..really very sorry..i know it's my fault that everything turn out this way...if i knew this is going to happen...i won't even wanna start and in the end hurt you so much...
but i do have wonderful time with you...never regret being with you..but i'm sorry i've hurt you...
many memories came back recently...where i go..what i do...i can't stop..when i saw couple..i will think even more..think of the past..what we do..where we go..
something is making it worst...just can't stop thinking and blaming myself...why...the only time i'm not thinking is when i'm working...SHUCK...but i'm too tired to work too...

my back is aching..my legs are hurting..my heart is tearing...

yoz ppl!!
first day of SIP...hmm..not bad...
many foreigner worker there...didn't really talk to them yet..
except for the guy guiding me...FENDI___..he's a indonesian ar..then got Willie..ex Tp student..got a few others also ex Tp one..eh..
was posted to the immunology section-test for HIV, syphillis and etc..yea..meaning i'm dealing with blood that may contain such virus..ha..but i haven touch those sample yet ar...tried 2 tests today..those agglutination one..learn abit bout the machine...
then afternoon..sort out sample..got stool sample..pus..swab..blood...lihuey saw green urine..eh..she today observe the microscope for malaria parasite..using the QBC technique..ha...sound familiar ya..kk..
but i afternoon got nothing to do after sorting the sample...whole day reading the SOP and manual until i sian man..
hope tml got things to do ba..
hmm...kinda sad...cos next week will be working from 1pm-9pm everyday..sat also need to work..1pm-5pm..haiz..what a weird timing...cannot slack with other frens..hmm..anyway..just hope i'll learn many many things from there...
all the best ppl...

something is bothering me...i cannot get it out of my mind...the feeling is shucky!!!
haiz...
wish i could turn back time...

SIP tml..oh..i mean later in the morning..but i'm still here online..haha..so fan jian...
waking up at 5.45am tml..meaning i got 4hrs plus to sleep later..
lets hope everything will go smoothly...

why am i thinking about such stuff now..i dun get it..why now...why make me think of it..
Arg...

*trying hard to sleep*

hello guys,
don't have the mood to blog anything recently.
going for attachment soon..this coming monday at 8.30am..
will need to take a 15mins bus ride to interchange then a 50mins MRT ride to Buona Vista then another 10mins bus ride to reach my attachment place..hmm..
quite worried actually..besides SIP we still need to do our Major Project..
each has report and logbook to do...interviews and etc.

doubting my ability..i shouldn't be but i am...
take care my dear frens out there...
treasure the time in school...studying is still the best thing...
treasure the frens you have made in your life...frens that clique are hard to find..
treasure your love ones too...

*best wishes to all*

helLo guys!!
i'm back from night cycling!!..haha..SHIOK!!..but butt super pain now ar..haha..
cos i and emily using own bike..so we cycle from tampines to east coast to meet 9 other frens..then cycle from east coast to SERAGOON!!!..haha..first time cycling so far man..then ate prata and cycle back to east coast again...reach there around 5am..then slack and rest till 7plus go home..haha..yeah..will be waiting for another one man..but i think hard le ar..cos i'm going attachment next monday le...OMG!!

kk..i'm posted to doctorslab Diagnostic Pte. Ltd...at Buona Vista..haha...science park..haha...so far ar!!!...got 3other frens same as me...monday report 8.30am...super early ar!!!...kk..anyway..really hope everything will be fine..and smooth...still have to do Major Project alson...alot of things to do for Major Project lei...hai...

hao le..i tired le...gonna go orh orh le...
those fren who are posted to places you dun wan to go...dun be sad k...
take care frens..

yoz!!..
hmm...let me see...friday went back to school to discuss bout club stuff then in school saw one of the ex-ASc member..lester..the first batch one..hmm..talked for 1 hour....then didn't meet sis..so sorry ya..hee..
well..asked him for advise..bout organising solid project and etc...eh..yea..nice chat with him..
think ASc is really an amazing club..really let ppl get bonded to it..get bonded to the people in there...it's the passion that we all have man..

sat: stayed at home the whole day...watch GUNDAM..again..ha..and pack my room..
pack school stuff...club stuff and
our stuff...sob sob..cried..cos i took out everything he gave me..and memories just flow and flow and flow...now..there are saved in a box...except those soft toys..very sad...those cards he made..those stars he folded..those movie we watched..and one cd of our photos and the "love me" song he created..the braclet and watches he gave and flowers...bears..haiz..it's all over le...
hope he is getting better...really hope so...

sun: went church then had class..very interesting class..=)..then went chilling out with sis..ha...walk until dunno where to walk...walk until leg pain sia..ha..then i bought two tops and a water bottle..past few days i bought a short and a converse top..ahha...i learning to buy clothes le!!..haha..okok..must control..but i still wan more clothes and jeans and short..and..ha..kk..

tml going back to sec school..gonna meet up with two of my teachers..so excited...very long never see them le...then meeting a secondary school fren..he is going to pass me my birthday present..eh..yea..
looking forward for tuesday to come man ...first: i will know where i will be posted to for SIP...second: i'm going for NIGHT CYCLING!!..haha..yea yea..happy happy..
i still wanna go Sentosa one lei..before SIP starts..dunno got chance ornot..aiyaya...kk..
i shall end le man...type so long le...
pray hard i wont be sick man....my nose are running now sia...hmm..kk
take care my frens...

*chasing back my nose.. -_-''' *

yoz ppl!!
today KBOX was FUN!!..haha...
quite hyper at the beginning..sing and clap and move move body...
very happy to see all of them...together..ha..got 16 of us went..the room super big..
i think i sound very man now..ha..cos abit no voice le..

alright..mood start to change after they sang the xuen ze duet song..i almost cried...
we always sing that song when we go Kbox...the lyrics...tt time when i sing..i really sang from the bottom of my heart...but i broke the promise..come to think of it...the relationship will end up like that is really becos of me...u really should not think of me anymore..not worth it...Argg...

then after awhile..tried hypering up again..but i guess i'm abit tired too..so no strength le..ha..
It's great to see yanming...peiling and fad again man...miss ya so much...
take care yangming and fad...you two going to become MAN soon ya..haha...
train hard..slack hard...rest well..eat well...haha..
see you guys after 3weeks!!!

hEy gUys!!
finally, it's over...last exam paper in TP...finished!..kinda happy but sad too..
studying is really the best thing in life...even though i haven start work yet but i do know working is boring..aiyaya..
still thinking whether to cont. studying or work first.. some of my frens are checking out on oversea Uni and etc le...i here still slacking..alamak...see SIP how first ba..haiz..

went to cut and highlight my hair yesterday...yup yesterday..ha...my frens were like..WHAT..you so RELAX ar..ha..then..i wore skirt to school today..HAHA..
first time wear to school..the other time i changed in school..that's for my AY04/05 AGM one..this time round is wear to school..ha..
so jing zhang in the morning...dunno is jing zhang for my paper or cos i pai sei i wear skirt..
anyway...there are many iNterEsting remarks..ha..got ppl say i AA=attract attention..got ppl came to ask me for 4 numbers ..they wanna buy 4D...some say the pigs are flying..got one gal say...will fall in love with me..hAhA..
of cos got ppl say i pretty and cute ar..ops..ha..kk...i shall stop here le..ha..*flying flying*..ha..

After paper went out with emily and sheewee..to cineleisure watch HERBIE FULLY LOADED..ha..very nice show..very funny and cute..but i teared in there also..ha..got some sad part ba...yup..i teared easily..eh..
cineleisure...hmm...many memorises again..the coke mini cafe..the cinema..hmm..kk..
after that went to IKEA..the food there is nice..the cheesecake is great..ha..
have a great time there...eh..
tml going Kbox..hope will be fun too..

alRight..that's all for now...
take care ppl...miss yA guYs so much...

All the best for your tml paper...good luck..

why am i still awake?...eh..
went to my old blog and read all the entries..
good memoeies flows, bad memories flow...tears flow..
this year is really a very "challenging" year for me...emotionally challenging...

i know i shouldnt be reading those now but i dun seem to be getting over it...
why?....why use the word hate...it's such a strong word to use...hai...

hEllo helLo...blogging again..
lastest update: my E700 phone spoil le..currently deciding whether to repair it which will cost bout 80-100bucks or just live with one phone...but i got 2number..hmm..
jus finish bbank paper...still alright..
choing bpharm later..
think this sem result will be C+ C+ B and B..haiz...not being extreme..but i stating the fact...LMQA is PBL...from experience..my PBL sub always get C+...DDCT..memory subject which i suck at it...Bpharm..maybe can aim B..bblood..i wanna score for it but dun think can cos of my quizzes and termtest..did badly..haiz..whatever...it's over..

so many disasters happening...feeling so sad..so lost..what's happening?...is it all planned?..eh..
got typhoon..flood...fire..plane crash...we singaporean are really lucky man..

so sad i'm hated by someone now...have i done wrong?...thanks for trying to be friend with me...i got nothing much to say..

*crying with the nation*

nothing much happen today...just study...play guitar...study....play guitar...then sis go beach never tell me!!..ha...kk..
hope wat i studied went in..
dad watching anime now...GUNDAM..haha...quite nice to watch lei...i cried..
talking about friends...war...become enemy cos they are force too..killing..revenge...haiz..
nowaday so many disaster also..what's happening man?

glad 2 know my dear sis has sort out things le..=)..haha..
glad...really glad..

its been 19days.....
how are u....haiz...

*can't stop blaming myself..*

hAha!!....
i know i shouldn't be doing this now ar...but ya..
i've learn how to upload songs to my blog le!!
haha...thanks Sheewee!!

kk...got to go study le..imagine..i only finish one topic of Bpharm from 1pm to now..haha..

*signing out*

today is a boring day...
stay at home the whole day but only manage to study 5topic of bloodbank ....i got 12 topics to study ar...
haven touch Bpharm..shuck...

it's really no good to be alone at home...especially at this moment...at this type of situation...think and think and think...JoAnNe aR...stop thinking can ornot...haiz..

Knew something...kinda sad again...it just tells me he has not get over it yet...he is still very sad...haiz..

been thinking about...my school life...always a loner...eversince from sec sch...dun have clicks...always mixing around with different people..different group...sometimes..just alone...is it a good thing or a bad thing...?
the good thing will be : i won't feel drifted apart from the group if i have other committment...i can just do whatever things i want...can go anywhere i want...
the bad thing will be : sometimes...i'll just be alone..it always happen...
feel weird when i just join any of the groups...then after that...go seperate ways...eh...

but i'm really glad i have two good fren from poly now...my da jie emily and also sheewee...really thank you...
my xiAo mei from sec sch...dorothy..even though we seldom meet up but ya..eh...just the bond rite...
these are the only good frens i have...living in this world for 19years...eh...
sec school frens...pri school frens...haiz...only when we are having our once a year gathering then will chat chat...after that...no more...even on msn...won't talk to each other too...haiz...my tkd frens...i think i'll be seperated from them le ba...tkd...where good memories flow..but sad ones too...as for club...i dunno...dun dare to put my hope so high...life is unpredictable rite...haiz....i thought after my sec sch,my sec school frens will still contact each other but things just change..new friends..new environment...new comittment...haiz...
As for my three good frens..they have their other friends..other committment too...so..ya..can't always be with me rite...eh...sometimes..just feel abit pai sei to look for you guys..cos i know you all got other friends too..if you tell me to join you guys...i guess you will know my answer...i will feel extra...haiz...dunno what i'm typing liao ar...haiz..
get a liFE man JoAnNe...

*getting emotional...*

here i am again!!
i guess i'll be blogging almost everyday now le ba...eh..ya..

alright..quite moody this morning...wake up at 10plus..too tired le...have not been sleeping well recently..couldn't get to sleep ar...body aches..back ache...sickening..ha..
moody cos of last night i think...think too much le..until morning i'm still thinking..until revision lec..still thinking...
memories of us having TKD training flow back...back till my very first tournament..he was my coach..he was so worried..but i won..yeah!..then memories of us going to the national tkd centre to train kept appearing..the very first time i went there was to go for a selection..to be selected for an oversea tournament...i was there cos in the SPEX tournament..i was the given the title..best female player ar..so..ya..but we were late...then didn't warm up then spar le..then i didn't know can hit head until i got hit..then..haiz..they are just too strong for me le...so fierce..i just stand there like sand bag ar..ha..

Do not give up your hope k..hope you will cont. training..i know you will...it will be good if you can cont. to pursue your dreams..your dreams that you had given up partly cos of me...your dream of being a national fighter to represent singapore...it's every sportman dream i guess...jia you k...

Went to the beach today..feel much better after that..talk alot to my dear sis...ya...had a nice chat with you gal...see you smile...my worry drop half le..ha...my english power man..haha...
hope to see you smile more k...
oh ya...almost got bang by a car on the way there man...stupid driver..turn left when he's not suppose to...lucky sis reaction fast enough...lucky lucky..really very close...*thank god*...she's alright...we were really SHOcK!!!...eh..

alright..got to go study le man...but..really sian sia..okok...
All the best people!!..

*tiMe wilL hEals*